My boyfriends mum......?

She is a lovely woman and has never treated me with anything but respect and kindness BUT (why is there always a but) she treats her family like dirt. She never goes out, she claims she has no friends but she has had friends in the past and pushed them away. She refuses to let her husband go out-even to family events. She restricts her 3 sons social lives (I'm with the eldest who is 18, the other two are 15 and 13). She doesnt work but is doing a garden design course and her husbands pay is not wonderful and they are struggling. Yet she will spend all the money on herself, plants, a new kitchen, new clothes. This is when sometimes they haven't enough money to buy food-and I'm serious on that.

My question is-what should i do? i love my boyfriend and i hate seeing him so hurt by her. And i love his family too and i hate myself for getting angry at his mum. some advice please.

My boyfriends mum......?
Well all you can do is be supportive to his feelings, and wishes. If you can take him out, do diferent things with him so he can get away from the house that would, and will b great. In the case of mom, you can voice your opinion,but all it will do is put your bf in the middle choosing you, or his moms and you don't want that sweetie. Just be supportive of him, and his wishes. It will pay off at the end.
Reply:Just be there to support your b/f. There is not much you can do other than perhaps encourage him to speak to his mother. It would seem very rude of to them I'm sure, if you spoke up about personal family matters even though it is affecting your life. It is a difficult situation, but you can really only confront her on the actions she did which would directly effect you. You can't speak up for anyone else if they refuse to do so.
Reply:she has to want things to change herself. seems like she runs the show around there. her husband needs to step up as the other adult in the family and maybe the 18 year old could say something to help out. but without any of this happening, things will continue to be the same way.....always.
Reply:There is nothing that you really can do. Unfortunately, it's not your place to say anything to her or try and change her.